Questions, questions, questions…

I never really knew how motherhood would change me. I knew I wanted to be more patient and less controlling, but what I didn’t know is that motherhood would lead me to question my every move.

The minute I found out I was pregnant questions starting popping into my head: is my baby going to be healthy, what should I be eating, am I getting enough sleep, did I have enough folic acid to ensure proper development of this little person…

As my pregnancy continued so did the questions: should I be eating this, is my weight gain normal, what will this little person look like, when will it arrive, will it be a boy or girl…

Now that Thomas is here, the questions are different: is Thomas getting enough milk, am I picking him up too much, am I changing his diaper enough, am I the reason he has gas and should I change my diet? Is he too hot, too cold, getting enough sleep, why won’t he go to bed in the evening, is it something I’m doing and the list goes on?

I know I will continue to second guess myself forever. I realize there isn’t a day that will go by during which I won’t consider doing things differently for the health and well-being of my little Thomas.

One thing I do know is that we love him despite sometimes making my nights a living hell, despite having taken away all my independence, and despite forcing me to change my vomit covered shirt several times a day.

I hope one day his daddy and I will be able to look back and realize all these questions were worth it and that we’re proud beyond belief of our little man.

Advertisements

One thought on “Questions, questions, questions…

  1. The first few months are more than a bit overwhelming. I remember bringing The Boy home from the hospital and wondering who on earth decided I was qualified to do this…

    Babies are tougher than we give them credit for. (And they all have gas… all of them.) Just trust that he’ll let you know what is enough, not enough or too much. (Except for holding and snuggling, you can never have too much of that.)

    Sounds like you’re both doing just fine.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s